” Face your music and learn how to dance. And when your life is out of tune because you got careless with how you chose to play…don’t blame others. You made the music.  Now…find a better teacher, and stick with your will…to someday make music from all the missed notes that taught you what it took …to make it beautiful.” ~Kathy Potts

Since 2005 I have been ‘in search’ of something.  I never really knew what that was.  I’ve spoken on the topic of “find your voice” and “choose to play” for almost 6 years around the US.  And until recently, had not moved the topic forward.

What happens after you choose your game?

You face the reality and you learn to live with it.

I attended a service last weekend and pastor Brad White shared some good insight…spiritual or not…it is what I see in my weeding process of folks who are ready for coaching or not.  He said, “Failure does not stop us.  Set-backs do not stop us.  Fear of facing reality is what stops us.”

Wow.  So true.  So true.

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“Build trust not page views.”  This is a line I read from dear friend Deana Goldasich’s post that was honored in Content Marketing World’s Top Blog Posts.  So first, “hoot-hoot” to Deana for a major rise to the top in her industry!   AND…hooray for the idea that the whole purpose of connecting is NOT for the numbers.  It’s the relationship.  And if the relationship is good…the numbers will follow. Why?  Because people seek out and enjoy being influenced by those they trust.

• Who follows you because they enjoy & desire being influenced by you?
• Do they walk away saying, ‘that was nice’, friend you or link you, and then become a #?
• Or, do they say ‘wow, I want more’…and become a new source of influence with you?
• What is your close rate…for the relationship to turn into continuous value?

So many people play the relationship consumption game.  We go to meetings, shake hands, collect business cards, enter people into databases, friend them on FB or LinkedIn and then what?  Do we listen for what that person is up to in life?  Do we hear the opportunity to truly connect her or him to what that ‘next’ goal, aspiration, and desire is?  Do we selfishly and freely give what we have, not knowing and being okay if we don’t get something in return?  Do we use our power to connect them to their own freedom?

The most priceless asset any of us have is our ability to think.  Therefore, when we give someone the permission and access to our thinking, the next best gift is allowing that person to influence our thinking. It is free…and priceless.

Change people’s thinking for the good, for their best interests…and you have found the key to a new world order.

(Join Kathy Oct. 21st in Denver, CO for the Business Building Workshop.

Early Bird Registration and Pricing at www.destinationbreakthru.com)

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Earlier this week, the sound of impotent thinking could be heard, as each wheel of progress in my head seemed to run over some unforeseen nail…bringing me to a full and complete stop.

If you want to hear the mood that comes to mind when I was writing this post…feel free to put this on in your background…before you read)

Fwump!

There went the steady focus on my business.

Thinking was like trying to move through chilled honey.

Fwump!

Relationships were now floating paralyzed in the air.

Each holding the face of a surprised pixie -  open-mouthed, and googley-eyed.

Fwump!

My palette flipped a switch from salad and green tea to caffeine and sugar.

Fwump!

My Zen…vanished.

I’ve had 4 weeks of leaping forward with bounding stride.  Been – in “the zone”.

Why on EARTH is my mentality deciding to take a break!?!?!…?

What the heck just happened?

( Can you relate? Sounding at all familiar?)

Read on for self-directed questions you can ask to help you make the most of these moments in you YOUR life.

Looking to get away?  Want to ‘just collect your thoughts’? In addition, ENSURE you walk away productive?  Look at what the Destination Diva’s experienced .

WANT YOUR OWN EXPERIENCE? Destination Breakthru is traveling to Champagne France in February 2012, Sonoma Valley California in June 2012, and Vail Colorado in Fall of 2012. CONTACT KATHY to get your seat save…ONLY 14 seats are available!

Looking to have someone facilitate your brain, as you work through your weeds?  Inquire about Kathy’s 3-Hour Breakthru! Visit www.oncoreperformance.com or contact us at kathy@oncoreperformance.com or (813) 786-7226

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I’d like to invite you into an experience. The experience of the… “The Waiting Line”.

Add dimension to this blog…and open this link http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kXdW3fgD3bU&feature=related

 Welcome, to the “Waiting Line”. It’s a place of hope, a place of anxiety, a place of possibility, of disappointment. It’s a place where time seems to pass slowly, and yet progress is taking place. It’s a place where whatever is about to happen, is just one step closer, but not quite there.

I love this picture of the waiting line, because of the drastic view of the child, separated from the line, fully clothed and walking in the opposite direction. When did we all get ‘in line’ in life anyway? When we decide the way we would live life was waiting…rather than experiencing?

How does it feel to be ‘in the waiting line’?

At the grocery store, in the 10 items or less line with someone ahead of you who has 2 items?

No, wait… Make that 12 items. How does that feel?

How does it feel to be ‘in the waiting line’?

At the ticket counter about to board a plane.

No, wait! A boat.

A vacation to a destination you’ve wanted to go for so long.

No, wait… Make that a business trip.

Wait… wait… wait! Another, business trip to someplace you don’t want to go to… Again.

Drudgery. Leaving your family. Sleeping in some hard hotel bed.

WAAAAIT!!! Change that. Make it a family trip. To see people you haven’t seen for a long time.

People you want to see and build memories with.

Ooooo wait… People you have to see, an obligation trip ….because they are, family.

How does it feel …

Waiting in line at the movie theatre, about to see a movie you didn’t choose.

No, wait…make that a movie you’ve been anticipating for months.

In line, waiting to get on your favorite ride at Disney?

WOW WAIT! Your CHILD’S favorite ride.

In line, during the heat of summer.

No, wait. In the cool air of fall. Of Spring?

There are a lot of reasons to take…pause, and change perspective. Does this make the wait any better?

You didn’t get there by surprise; that “Waiting Line” you are in. You prepared to get there. You partook in conversations. You took steps. You had time filled with emotions and times of being very awake. And there were times you were in ‘autopilot’, where perhaps it just felt like you ended up there.

For any line you are in, there is a building-up. And then for a moment…you cross over…the line.

No, wait. For just a moment…there was…no…line. It was the moment where anticipation breaks, and through you go into ‘the moment’, the experience you’d been waiting for.

Does life’s meaning wait…for that, those, single moments?

As you accomplish one thing or another, finally, you are no longer waiting. You get to move on. For good or bad…the tension is resolved…you break through to the other side.

And then before you know it. You are right back ….

In line….

Waiting….

We are always in line. Life can be terribly frustrating if our perspective is that we are truly alive ONLY when we are getting to the other side….What if TRUE life is found in both in line and when break through the transaction to the other side? Maybe, life IS as much where you spend time before, and after, ‘the transaction’…. Before that tension is resolved and you are on “the other side”. Those moments of building up and planning, and shifting; moments of hope and disappointment, and yes… even waiting.

Like the child in the picture…life doesn’t have to be a waiting line. You can step-out at any moment…AND enjoy the line. Afterall, this is YOUR life line.

To find out more…to find out HOW…keep reading.

If you are standing in line, and you want to step out soon, check out Destination Breakthru™ coming to France in February 2012, Napa Valley in June 2012, and Vail, Colorado in October 2012.

Want some help getting to ‘YOUR MOMENT’ inquire about the 3-Hour Breakthru™ with Kathy Potts

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Last week I traveled to Anaheim, CA for the National Speaker’s Association Influence ’11 Convention.  As the owner of a speaking, coaching and consulting practice, this is the time of year when ‘a new set of insights’ sparks what will become the path I travel for the next 12 months! It is an exciting time as the influx of ideas pours in, and at this convention the ideas are palpable and echoing through the hallways as experienced professionals and “newbies” mix and mash together, creating an audience pool of open-minded seekers… all of us looking for ‘next’ in our coming months.

A fascinating presentation caught the attention of this ‘Petri-dish’ of professionals; Ken Dychtwald, PhD presented “How the AGE WAVE is Transforming Our Lives, Our World and Our Profession”. He presented that for the first time in the recorded history of humankind we have reached a longevity point that is causing as many as 6 generations to live simultaneously under one roof… and this family make-up is becoming ‘normal’.

We are experiencing a transformation unlike ANY OTHER witnessed to mankind.  Two-thirds of the entire population of anyone who has lived to be 65 years old is living…right now.  “The gravitational pull of the marketplace no longer sits with the youth generation.  “Hip” is being redefined by the RE-BOOM generation”. What a compelling phrase.

He proposed that the questions asked of 20 year olds…what do I want for my life…as they are at the beginning are transforming into questions by the largest mass of experienced livers of life…

What do I want for my life…next?

Or is it really just the Boomers?

Though the Boomers have always generated an amazing amount of energy, I disagree that it is the 65+ generation that sits as the ONLY gravitation pull in this question of “what’s next?” My experience in my practices has me say it is the question WE ALL ASK…at MANY stages in life… More importantly, for all of us it serves as the catalyst. In a way, we are always… “Nexting”. And, at this particular time in history this may be more critical than ever to get focused and really grab a hold of our own reins to make sure where we go is where we want to be.

From where I sit, there is a WAVE of WAKING-UP that is occurring as people begin to recognize whether or not they are holding onto the reigns of their fate.  The bit is in our mouths…and the leather ties lay, in our hands.

The age of capability is dawning, as the lives we live last longer…and the human condition to dream, aspire and live extends…there are simply more people waking-up.  The good news…you don’t have to wait until you’re 65 years old to “Next” for yourself!

(Contact Kathy for “opera-tunities” to take YOUR professional dream to new Highs! 

Kathy@oncoreperformance.com

Also, Destination Breakthru™ is headed to Paris, France in February, 2012.  This is a BOUTIQUE retreat, with 12… 9 seats left! Inquire as to how YOU will save your seat at the top of the Eiffel Tower for the show of YOUR life!  Call Kathy today (813) 786-7226.

Take your business to new highs in 2012 in this luxury mastermind retreat!

Can’t make February in Paris…well, then hop on board the Napa Wine Train in June, 2012.  Read More→

The hardships and lessons from all my years were situations intended to give me points of reference, to work through and call upon for empathy AND strength.  Without them, I would not have the wings to allow Destination Breakthru™ this new era in my life to take flight.

Opening the Floodgates

Back in college, (just a “few” years ago -wink) I went through a period of time where I was very… shall we say…confused, about many things.  I asked questions many people ask such as, “who am I?”, “what’s my purpose?”, and “what am I supposed to do with my life?”  I had also begun to recognize some demons I wrestled with and how hard I was working to keep them at bay.

At the time, I had discovered a quiet voice inside, coming more from my heart than my head, it told me I no longer wanted to be an aspiring opera singer. At first I wanted to ignore this voice and the more time went on, it got louder and louder and I simply could not …  my heart was opening and once I acknowledged it, the voice was very clear… and then something else happened….

A  floodgate opened… and I started to recognize other voices…. And memories began to whack me upside my head…

The secrets I harbored were so deep, and terribly dark, I couldn’t even say they had been a memory until one day in college they erupted like a continuous lava flow from an angered emotional volcano!  I thank God I had my Dad to help me. I shared with him my memories of being sexually abused at age 4-5, and I recognized the sense I’d been carrying of being a child with very deep, very dark secrets.

(I know this is hard to read just a few paragraphs into a blog…but all things happen for a reason, and have the chance to help.  The story has a happy ending…so please, keep reading to understand how 30 some years later, the facts of the past have become the foundation for the launch of a new era.  AND…learn how you too can have a breakthrough…in spite of, and in the face…of ANYTHING.)

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Last year I attended my first Tony Robbins seminar. Yes…I walked on the fire coals, lost my voice, and had the thrill of 40 hours with a master of personal performance.  Needless to say, with 40 hours of work packed into 3.5 days there were volumes of insights and lessons.

 I left this Tony Robbins seminar inspired and clear of my goal to reach 5.5 million lives with a process for taking a good look in the mirror and giving themselves permission to soar!

 With that goal in mind, my first thought was WOW…that’s going to take a lot of energy and my body needs to get “crack-a-lackin’” on being in shape for the journey. 

 When I got back I decided it was time to hire a personal trainer and thanks to Kelly Murphy with DiamondGirlz in Tampa, we began putting my body into a “shock and awe” campaign.  And I felt the pain of the work in every single muscle!

 Have you ever wondered why the heck it’s gotta hurt after you work out?  The details under the surface require that if you are going to build those muscles, you’ve first got to tear them.  Not bend them, not move them around…but literally BREAK THEM.

Such amazing bodies we have, that in a matter of days, when the fibers reconnect and rebuild…you are indeed stronger!  This is just a law of nature, but what a beautiful lesson for us to take into the mental side of life.

 What mental fibers do you need to BREAK FROM, in order to rebuild your confidence so that you are a  stronger, more capable you?

Keep reading for a quick exercise to pump yourself for the EXCEPTIONAL VOICE in YOU!

Join the ONCORE Community – leave your comments below.  Start a one-on-one conversation with Kathy at kathy@oncoreperformance.com

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That’s right; whatever you do…STOP setting goals. 

Don’t get me wrong, goals are good, but they aren’t the most powerful way to create a lasting future.  What are goals intended to do?  Let’s say they give you an indication that you are ‘headed in the right direction’.  But what happens when you get there?  What is the payoff?

The most memorable moments in life are those that create a sensory overload and give us some definite conclusion about the meaning of the life we are living.  Memories are actually stronger than any single goal, because they guide us to and from what we most desire.

Memories, tell us whether the moment paid off. 

Too deep?  Actually, its pretty simple…keep reading  for an example AND the ingredients to Pre-Create a 5-D Memory!

 (Are you sitting on the edge of unrealized goals?  Check out your chance to breakthrough your status quo, and create the memories of a lifetime at www.destinationbreakthrough.com)

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“Greatness is a state of mind.” – Thomas Edison

 What is your mind helping you be great at? 

Take a look over the past 24 hours of your life.  What were your first waking thoughts?  How did you spend your first hour?  What did you eat?  How did you greet the people in your life?  How did you manage the fires in your life?  How did you consider the long-term goals you have for yourself? What did you avoid?  What did you focus on just before you fell asleep?

Our days are made up of a series of thoughts, emotions, and habits and it’s the collection of these habits that produce our ‘status quo’.  And status quo is good…but what if you were meant to be…great?

For some, these habits are like old wagon trails engrained in our brain’s pleasure and pain centers, built to reinforce feelings we want to experience or avoiding those we don’t want to ‘go through’.  Unfortunately, in the fast-paced world in which we live it’s the later that gets more energy and attention without us even knowing it.  The path of least resistance.  Comfort.

And yet, some of the most significant moments in life come from those out of the ordinary, in fact…the extraordinary times in our lives.

(Get past your Status Quo at Destination Breakthru, July 22-24th, 2011 in Vail Colorado – www.destinationbreakthrough.com)

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This past Saturday there was a captivated room of professional speakers leaning into every word of one Steve Rizzo.   Steve is what you might consider the professional motivator behind many of today’s headline comics like Drew Carey, and Ron White. 

But his gift to us was what you might call, ‘Oh Shift!: The Ultimate Attitude Adjustment Handbook”, his yet to be released book.  He shared his take on how to acquire and sustain an optimistic attitude especially as professional speakers trying to get work over the last 3 years.

He shared this thinking pattern most of us…its call the ‘when-then’ pattern of thinking.   It came from his relationship with none other than Rodney Dangerfield.  While in Ft. Lauderdale headlining in Rodney’s comedy club, Steve asked if he was truly happy having FINALLY made it to the top at age 60.   Rodney’s response – his life sucked. 

Why you ask?  Because he had not learned how to be happy while on the journey.   He had made himself live life in a ‘when-then’ mindset.  And at age 60, he now regretted not having enjoyed his life while he was young.

How many of us set goals, and try making our way towards our aspirations with a set of restraints on our own happiness?  In my journey to leave Corporate America, I was certainly NOT immune to this myself.  As of July 7th, 2010 however…I have been towing the new road of being self-employed (and LOVING it).

Tonight I’ll be interviewed about the story of my life over the last several years as I add a few chapters to my story of Choose the Game. 

In preparing for the interview I talked with Change Thrivers Blogtalk showhost Afsaneh Noori about the adversity we must endure to while getting through our stories.  Steve reminded me that the word optimism can’t come without a need for it. 

Without the bad, tough, and rough times, the choice to BE optimistic and stand for ourselves would not exist. 

So before you think you are stuck without a light…remember there are always 2 sides to every coin. 

Perhaps yours needs to be flipped?

Enjoy the day, and CHOOSE YOUR GAME!!!!